象征而非具象性地使用语言
我们谈论语言，而语言已经成为某种第二层级的东西；它已经具象化。实际上，它经常无法表达我们真正内心的感受，有时语言本身可能会成为一种防御机制，特别是在那些过度依赖理智化的个体中。从听取的角度来看，我们也以非常具体的方式解释语言。
有时，一些具有边缘特征的个体可能会听到支离破碎的语言，他们可能无法理解或感受到完整句子的原始含义。例如，如果有人说：“我现在并不想抛弃你”，一个边缘的人可能会听到“我现在不想抛弃你，但在此之后的每一秒，我可能会抛弃你”。
因此，倾听的过程本质上是一种塑造思维的方式。由于这些个体被情感淹没，他们无法通过情感有效地理解世界或人与人之间的关系。在这种情况下，他们倾向于牢牢抓住语言以便理解。然而，由于他们无法真正理解语言在语境中的全面完整含义，他们还难以将语句与当时的语境结合起来。例如，同一句话在一个语境中可能有这个意思，在另一个语境中可能有另一个意思。然而，由于他们对被抛弃的强烈感觉深深植根于他们的情感核心中，他们倾向于以相同的方式解释它。因此，当他们用语言与你争论或证实他们的假设时，实际上是试图证明，假设总有一天他们会被抛弃。因此，与他们进行长时间的语言纠结实际上是一种共谋，是对他们无意识模式的再现。
We talk about language, and language has become something on the second level; it has concretized. In reality, it often cannot express our true inner feelings, and sometimes language itself may become a defense mechanism, particularly in individuals who heavily rely on rationalization. From a listening perspective, we also interpret language very concretely.
Sometimes, individuals with some borderline characteristics might hear fragmented language, and they might not be able to understand or feel the original meaning of a complete sentence. For example, if someone says, “I don’t want to abandon you right now,” a person on the edge might hear it as, “I don’t want to abandon you now, but every second after this, I might abandon you.”
So, the process of listening is essentially a way of shaping the mind. Because these individuals are overwhelmed with feelings, they cannot effectively understand the world or the relationships between people through their emotions. In such cases, they tend to tightly grasp onto phrases for understanding. However, because they cannot truly comprehend the full and complete meaning of a phrase in the context of language, and they also struggle to connect the statement with the context at that moment. For instance, the same sentence might have one meaning in one context and a different meaning in another. Yet, due to their intense feelings of abandonment, deeply embedded in their emotional core, they tend to interpret it the same way. So, when they use language to argue with you or validate their assumptions, they are essentially trying to prove, assuming that one day they will be abandoned. Therefore, engaging in prolonged linguistic entanglement with them becomes a collusion and a repetition of their unconscious patterns.
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